Jeremiah 31:7-14; Ephesians 3:1-14; John 1:10-18
So, I had this uplifting, inspiring sermon planned––all about New Year’s Resolutions and living in the grace of God and how we could resolve to give up contempt and embrace compassion. I was going to talk about how God chose us to be holy and blameless in love, as it says in Ephesians, completely apart from what we have done or said, completely unearned, free without purchase. And I was going to talk about how living holy and blameless in love is actually summed up in living lives where we daily follow Christ in grace and truth, as it says in our Gospel reading from John.
And then I was going to talk about what grace actually means––that it is God’s “unmerited” gift, unearned, undeserved gift of healing and restoration and liberation and empowerment. And I had this really clever line that it was freedom from living lives of contempt towards those we hate, and the power to live with compassion and understanding for them, instead––Compassion, instead of contempt.
And finally, I was going to say how living in the grace of God, having compassion for others instead of contempt, is pretty impossible, but because God has actually chosen us to live this way, it means that God gives us the strength to do this, and that God does it by first of all extending compassion to us. That God understands what we’re going through, and that God is constantly reminding us, in our moments of self-hatred and self-judgement and negative self-talk, that it’s okay. And that as long as we have compassion for ourselves, we can have compassion for others. That, through the power of God, or the grace of God, the impossible becomes possible and so we can actually let go of contempt and hatred, and that, through God’s love, we will all be healed and liberated and empowered, as a community and as the world.
Sounds like it would have been a good sermon, right? A New Year’s Resolution to live in grace? A resolution to have compassion not contempt for those we despise most in the world? Begin by reminding ourselves daily of the compassion God has for us? I was excited to preach this sermon - it felt genuine to me, I believed in it, I was ready to make it my one New Year’s Resolution. Compassion, not contempt. I was doing great on it, until Friday.
On Friday morning, I had my coffee and I checked the news, as I always do. And I read that a certain President ordered a drone-facilitated, extrajudicial killing––what CBC called an assassination––of a government official of another country, in a third country. Yes, I suppose you could say this official deserved it, but this President executed him without the approval of Congress, without consulting with any of the members of Congress who are supposed to be briefed on intelligence matters, with complete disregard for the Constitution and the very principles of democracy. This President acted as if he were God, and effectively painted a very large target on American soldiers and their allies in the entire Middle East, single-handedly destabilizing what is already a very dangerous situation, with global consequences.
Compassion, not contempt? Gone. Just gone. My whole inspirational sermon undone in a moment; my own New Year’s Resolution to extend God’s grace and compassion to those who annoyed me––which was working great on people who cut me off in traffic, and on rude customer service people, and on stir-crazy children who are still on winter break and can’t stop provoking each other into arguments––crashed and burned. I simply could not have any compassion for this President. I only had the deepest contempt, and anger.
Maybe you, too, have felt anger and contempt for someone in your life. It might not be a President––I acknowledge that I may be over-invested in international affairs. But I’m guessing there’s somebody, either in the present or in the past, for whom you cannot feel compassion, only contempt. It might be an ex, or an abusive parent. Maybe it’s a boss, or a co-worker. Maybe it’s a bully from childhood, maybe it’s someone from church. Maybe it’s someone whose opinions on politics, or the economy, or the environment are so radically different than yours that when you hear them talk, you want to leave the room. This coming year, actually, is going to be a particular challenge in this respect, politically-speaking. There are going to be many––too many––opportunities for contempt in the months to come, particularly for those of us who live here in Alberta. Polarization in the States is bleeding across the border, and we are becoming increasingly contemptuous of one another. We are going to find it harder and harder to exercise compassion. We are going to hear, “love your neighbour,” “have compassion,” and find ourselves wanting to make exceptions.
And yet this is our calling, as Christians. To daily extend compassion to those whom we think least deserve it. And this, essentially, is the problem with this living in grace, with following Christ and living holy lives in love, with compassion-not-contempt: it’s hard. Really, truly difficult. Jesus is not kidding with this love your neighbour stuff––he really means it when he says, follow me. God really does bestow grace as an unmerited gift on even the worst sinners, and God really does intend that we should do the same to those around us. And I believe that it does change the world, that the grace of God truly does heal and transform, that it frees us from hatred, that it makes the world––this world––a better place. I truly believe this. But it is so much work. I have lots of compassion when it comes to the little stuff, but when it comes to people who commit injustice, or abuse, or acts of callousness, compassion does not come easily, if at all. I fail.
Which, by the way, makes me even angrier––if it weren’t for these people, if it weren’t for ignorant and hard-hearted world leaders, if it weren’t for narcissistic, abusive people, if it weren’t for racists and bigots and homophobes, it would be waaay easier to live as a Christian. We laugh, but it’s true. These people get in our way when we’re trying to follow Christ, and they make obvious how truly bad we are at living out our Christian beliefs, at living in true grace.
Then again, no one said it would be easy. Living in grace, living with compassion for others is hard work. It’s a discipline, actually. It is a daily struggle of effort and commitment, and resolution, much like every discipline. But here’s the thing––it is doable, by the grace of God. In other words, God gives us––as a gift––compassion and understanding and the strength to have that compassion and understanding for others. But we have to work at it. We have a role to play in all this, we are not love-puppets with no free will or agency of our own. This gift of grace, this unmerited gift from God, only activates if we practice it. It’s like when the doctor gives you medication for a chronic condition. It only works if you take it, every day. Sure, you could probably miss a day without dying, but if you miss two days, and then three, and the days turn into weeks and months, you’re in big trouble. Leaving the pills to sit on the counter in plain sight won’t help, you actually have to take them. And God’s gift of grace is like that, prescribed, dispensed, sitting on the counter in plain view––truly effective, if we take it, if we practice it, regularly. It’s always waiting for us, but we have to regularly avail ourselves of it, daily remind ourselves that God’s grace, God’s love and compassion is there. We just actually have to take it in.
And the most effective way to take God’s grace in so that we learn to have compassion for others is to have it for ourselves, first. You see, as angry as I am at hateful, hard-hearted people, I am also ashamed that I can’t actually live what I preach––literally. I feel ashamed, and angry at myself, and guilty. Which does no good. You see, the ability to have deep compassion for others comes from having deep compassion for our own failures and shortcomings. We judge others the way we judge ourselves. And so grace starts in our own hearts, by repeating over and over to ourselves that God has compassion for us, even in as we fail to show compassion for others. God is our fountain, our source, our ground of compassion, not we ourselves. We are recipients, not creators, of grace. When you are overtaken by contempt or anger, know that God has compassion for you. When you hear that voice inside your head telling you that you’re failing as a Christian, that you just don’t get it, that you’ll never manage it, know that that is not the voice of God. The voice of God says, “it’s okay, I know it’s hard, you’ll get there one day, I forgive you, I love you, I will help you do it.” Just as God’s heart is soft towards you, soften your own heart towards yourself. And I do know, because I have experienced it, that when you do that, your heart will soften towards others. By the grace of God, compassion does grow.
Which is not to say that my heart has now completely softened and I have nothing but deep compassion for certain world leaders. Or for myself. It is extremely rare that contempt is eliminated overnight. Again, living in grace is a discipline that requires practice. But even as I struggle, as we all struggle, our God Incarnate continues to lavish the riches of God’s grace upon us. In the face of failure, God sees you with compassion, not contempt, knowing that one day, you will see yourself, and those around you, the same way. Keep at it, resolve to do it, even––God will see you through. Thanks be to God. Amen.
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